Dinner at My Place
by GlovecestQueen
Summary: Will goes to Hannsie's crib for dinner, and things heat up rather quickly...


so nicki minaj waz in hur super super hot club in los angelois and twerkin like no 2morro. it was reel cray. her plump buttox were visibol from milez upon milez awey. it was rlly hot. ke$ha was singing her knew hit single "dye yuung 45" and lady gaga was dancing like oh my god. will smith was o so totally baked in the corner. this was nicki's troo dream... this celeb club in los angelois was her numbor 1 desire... or so she thot...

the smoke in da cluub was so cloudy the sweat beaded dwon from chriss head in a supah sexy wei. the smoke and heat wuz to much for nikki so she danced ovah to the shirtless chris bown, his muscles gleamingf in da cliub light liek a stobe. chris brown wuz instently aware of nikki's presence for he sat up and said in da deepest and seixest voice in da wurld, "Gurl you so fine I wish I could plant you and grow a whole feild of yall!". Nikki Minaj smiled and went iun for da move...

nicki minaj put her hands on chiss tite booty cheeks. they were like rocks but glued onto a humane backside. it was truly amazneing. chris looked deepyly in2 nicki minajs eyes.

"qurl y u tryna b wite"

nicki minaj was appauled she is whte ok. she smaked chris brown upside the head, and when she lookd back hur hand, she notced littl strands of orange and yello hair between he fingrs.

"wat the hek!L!L!" nicki gave chris alook of extrme concern.

"I hav a condidtion it is nothin u should b worried about pls nicki i gotta have this pls i need 2 plant my seed tonight under the full moon or else i implde in the moonlight. i need u bb qurl" chris brown pleeds 2 nicki.

nicki presses her massv lips onto chrises face and they makes slurping noises.

"schulppsuchpulspsculsp" chris brown exclaims. chris brown grabs nickki minajs booty implants, but they pop outta her booty and onto the floor. nicki minaj cries.

"i didnt mean 2 do this 2 u nicki pls dont be mad!"

nicki minaj fainted.

3 year later she awoke frum her coma and had a gold tintod carriage eskort her to her club. luckily cris had been takin care of da place. she wantd to thonk him greatliy. but were was he? she checked under the floorboarded the wallz and even da toilettes. she looked for a rlly loang thyme and soon she was loosing hope. she grabbed a randome hottie by the tooshie and demaneded they tel her ware chriss was

"idk lol stupid hoe" said lil kim az she waltzid outta dere lolz

wtf thougth nicki 2 herself she was relly boilin over now... where was cris?

suddenly a loud poopin sound came from behind her and out of her deflated butt crawled cris. there he was, she sighed in relief.

"criss bby... i just wanted 2 thank u very mucho grandes for takin care of dis place for me!"

"anything for u, bby" cris winked. but something was wrong with his eyes...

"cris why r ur eyelashes orange?"

"nikki, I heva to tall you somnthung" sighed chriss brown his figure getting smaller and smaler as he tualked

"whut criss, you can tell me anyteng?" Nikki was shocked to find dat chgris now only sttood four feet tall.

"I...I...I dunno if u will still luv me for who I am..." said criss

"JUST SAY IT!1!" screamed nikki, tears streaming down her face as she pondered wat was da matter wid criss

"nikki," the tensiun built up so bad in nikki brian that her nostril started to gush pink liquid all ovah the place, criss haned nikki a tissue and continue, "nikki, I am lorax."

nicki backed aaway.

"w-W-wwhat? u is thee lorax?! nicki screechd

"yes," chris said as long orange strands of fur grew all ovr his body as he continued 2 shrink. nicki looked down at him and shrieked her eyes seering out of her skull. the eye juices melted down onto the floor like adam sandlers caraeer. nicki could no longer see the lorax which chris brown has become. the lorax tried to collect the juices from the floor and pour it back into nickis eyes sockkets, but it was usless, the lorax needed to bring it expert help in order to restore niki minages eyestite so she ride in starships up in da sky.

"chris u A$$ i need new eyes u must find me a new pair of eyes b4 i bust a cap in ur booty" nicki says while wrapping celefane on her empty eyescokets to preserve the freshness. she lovs herself some fresh eyes.

"i need the help of,,,"

"u need the help of who o?  
"the onceler."

the room whent silent. the oncele? we all thouhgt he killd himself bc he ovrdosed on drugs such as heroin and go go juice.

"how the hel is the oneler gonna helop me?"

"ull c" the lorax says as he hands nicki a set of instructions/map 2 get to the onceler,"u must read these and then u wil find the onecerl good locko."

the lorax disapored and nicki was left alone in her thots. she looked at the directions. they were cray.

the steps were as folows;

1. drink a glass of water (fill wit 2 litros)

2. take sum ecstacy

3. sacrifise 2 santana

4. hop around in a pentagrame 3 times

5. get shot in the face

so nicki swallowerd her fear and drank 2 litros of h30. after that she grabbbed sum extasee from under da floorborads. she ritualistically slaughtered jim carrey who was dying of a caprisun overdose on one of her club's sweet couchez. santana was pleseaded with the pleasurable sacrifse. after 2000 attempst she hoped like a lil bunnie in the shape of a pentagram 3 times and the annoyed, rlly pissed kesha shot her thru the cranium.

nicki fell to the floor and felt the prescnece of santana sweep over her. "hey-a gurl i hurd u ned some newh eyeballs for ur eyes"

Nikki looked up to see a middle-aged mexican wit orange yello tinted hair looking down upon her. "who...who r u" aked Minaj.

"I am sanatna, but you can call me the onceler"

"ok oncler what suld i do to get my eyeballs bac?"

"well," the onceler eys showed mischeif and sedcution in them as he leaned clsoer to da small niki minaj laying on the grounf. " i need u to do some...favors ;-)" he den began to welk over to da CD player and play relly sexy sax mucsic just for dem. "Niki minaj," the onceler said walking closer to the gurl whele striping "I'm gonna rock ur wurld"

onceler went in for the kill. he looked upon nicki minajs cruvy bodee and couldnt hold bach his urges. he had 2 do wat has 2 be done. he pushed nickiminage against a wall and began to "twerk" on her. nicki minaj was confused. the room was quiet and all she could hear is the oncler "twerking" on her. she pushed him away.

"boi wat do u think ur doing. u gotta do it right. (lets do this one last time)

nicki pushed oncie to the wall and began shaking her huge a double snakes all ovr the onclers stick lik e bode. he was totaly overhwlemed. his coke was getting so erct that he had 2 plant his seed into the alien goddes which is nicki minaj. he wanted 2 eat nicki minaj so bad jus like dr hannibal lectr.

"gurl, are u an indure pluming system, becuse i want to bure u in the wals of mi howse." Nickee didnt here him as she was wa 2 buzee with carlos santanas gyrating willy hoo. aftr about a weak, they stopped duing it because santana broak his pelvis."oka, imma be goin now sed santana". but nicki wouldn't let him go. "imma be grindin u till u give me new eyes" she said with that she took the corpse of gimm carraay and forcibly jostled the twos bodies together. "stop" satana cried"please somebody POUND THE ALARM". "no wone kan heare u" trickee said with spunkee determination. "u'll just haf to tak a beating frum dis bueaty".

santana pourd table salt into nicki's eyes but it just pushed all da rite buttons. soon she was in a frenzi like omj

nicki screamed in agony as the salt planted itself into nickkies raw eyesocket flesh. she could hear her tender flesh sizzling like the midnight sun as new eyes began to form. they needed the final ingredient to make these eyes. they needed sea man from the onceler.

"oncie u must inject ur penor into my eyesockets that is the only way."

"r u sure that seems a littl drastic"

"no it is ur on and only salvation"

"ok, then get it ovr with"

nicki minaj kneels down like when she praises jesus/ asks jesus to 4give her 4 her skins. the onclr slowly injects his penor into the eyehole shafts inside nicki minajs skull. it stings bc they are still fulla salt.

"ow" the onceler cries

"it is the only way" nicki minaj screamz

smoke begins to pour out of nicki minajs eyesockts as the oncler continues 2 thrust his manhood into nicki minajs thick skull.

it is done.

nicki minaj now has 20/20 vision and it is all thanks to the oncler.

goe bless the oncele


End file.
